66 - pluto the farthest

I might have missed it, but I didn't... Although it's
been almost two years but it is news to me, and that's what counts here.
Pluto is 'the smallest and farthest of the solar system's planets' as we
learned it. At least it was so.
Have you heard the news? 'The only planet not yet visited by a spacecraft'
is no longer one of the nine planets of our solar system.
By the way according to the new classification by
the International Astronomical Union
there are no more than eight from now (I don't mean now lol) on.
Have you felt it?
A sort of sadness for an object that is not
in touch with our micro lives at all?
That's what I love about being human;
being able to form empathy even with a 'thing'. Wonderful!!
Plus, here is the lesson,
when you are the faraway and difficult to reach,
it makes easy for them to rule you out.

the song is cute and dedicated
to the smallest and the farthest planet in the solar system.
heart-warming like all sweet lullabies...

by Clare and the Reasons

Pluto I have some frightful news dear
in the New York Times
They've just reported you've been overthrown (aah ahh ahh)
from your solar throne for good

Pluto they say that you can't handle
your own gravity
well how can you overcome your body force
to clear the path for your own orbit

Now all the planets will gather around and have a thing for you
They'll wrap their orbits warmly around you and
send you off with love
Chin up pluto the stars still want you and we down here do too
you know what to do, just keep on keeping on

Pluto I have some frightful news dear
in the New York Times
They've just reported you've been overthrown (aah ahh ahh)
from your solar throne for good


-------
Following is another characterization
of the last planet. I haven't read it but seems funny.
Don't worry I will try to write without reading soon as well..

In my continuing efforts to save Pluto from being taken off the planets list
her on earth I was granted an exclusive interview with the rogue ice chunk.

John: First off, thanks so much for taking the time to talk with me Pluto,
appreciate the effort. I know it's a been a really hard week.

Pluto: You don't know the half of it John. One day I'm spinning around
the sun minding my own business and the next I'm not even considered
a planet anymore? What's up with that? You know how much work goes
into getting around the sun for me? You take it for granted on earth,
you're pretty close and Mercury don't even get me started.
We all know the sun is in charge and who do you think gets the boot?
Didn't he think I'd notice?! I might be a trillion miles away but I have eyes alright?

John: I hear you Pluto, you know I'm in agreement. I've had issues with
Mercury for some time now. Let's talk about the past first put it in some
context for everyone. You were discovered in 1930…

Pluto: Dude. I'm like 20 billion years old. Discovered? Next question.

John: Sorry, I was just saying that Clyde Tombaugh in Arizona spotted
you and from then on you were a planet.

Pluto: Yeah and I never got to thank that guy.
Was he some sort of great earth scientist?

John: No, just some dude from Arizona who decided you were a planet.

Pluto: What is wrong with you people? You let some guy named
Clyde Tombaugh make that kind of decision?

John: Hey it was 1930, we were in the midst of a depression.
Planets weren't at the top of the list of priorities.

Pluto: Okay but if you tell me Mercury was discovered by someone
who knew what they were talking about and THAT'S why they are
still a planet I'm going to be pissed.

John: Did you know you were actually closer to the Sun than Neptune?

Pluto: Well look, I do sweep in closer then Neptune once in awhile but
clearly in all of your books and models on earth, I'm the furthest away.
You wouldn't teach it in your books if it weren't true right?

John: Well we can't even agree to teach evolution in our books

Pluto: That's because God created you in what? 7 days? 7 nights?

John: What about you?

Pluto: I had a pretty good view, it was some impressive shit.

John: So you have three moons right? They were going to call
one of them a planet at one point?

Pluto: Yes! Here I am having to deal with the fact that Charon
was about to become of equal standing to me and the next they
get denied and then I get stripped of my status! Granted, having
to deal with Charon on an equal playing field would have been
devastating as Charon can be a REAL bitch but I would have taken
that over the public lashing I just took. How am I going to explain
this to Hydra? Hmmm? How? What about Nix? Nix is going to take
this the hardest. That little cold stump of rock has feelings you know.
Granted, its made of nothing but molten rock and is about 700 degrees
below freezing but under that is a heart of gold.

John: Do you think size had anything to do with this?
You were the smallest planet of the nine.

Pluto: Do I think they were discriminating based on size? Yes, of course.
Look, you aren't going to bully Saturn or Uranus, they're huge and
of course if you provide the kind of comedy Uranus does?

John: Oh that reminds me, did you hear the one
I said about a rocket in Uran…

Pluto: Yeah yeah yeah, I know. The only thing I've provided is the name
for that fed up dog on Mickey Mouse. Its almost not a dog. I mean,
have you ever SEEN a dog that looks like that? He looks like an idiot.
He looks nothing like me in person. I'd rather be named Lassie or Benji.
I was really named after the Greek lord of the underworld, Hades,
who in Roman mythology is referred to as Pluto. Did you know that?! Huh?
That is BAD ASS. But then Walt Disney comes along and associates me with
that douchebag of a dog. LORD OF THE UNDERWORLD?!
You can't BUY juice like that. Stupid ass dog.

John: Back to the size thing. You're much smaller than seven of the solar
system's moons including the Earth's moon. Don't you think if you are
names a planet THEY should?

Pluto: Your moon is ass. Seriously, have you looked at your moon?
I mean really took a good look at it? Total ass. I pity your moon.
I'd take Nix or Hyrda any day over your shitty moon.

John: As of Aug. 24th, Pluto has been demoted from planetary status
to the classification of dwarf planet. So the solar system is now
down to 8 planets.

So you're a dwarf.

Pluto: Look, being a planted was all you needed to get in to anything?
You have no idea how impressive that status is. Now I go to a party and
I'm on a dwarf planet list? There are meteorites that will be further up
the list the I am. Its embarrassing.

John: You've been demoted in status because you does not meet one
of the three main conditions by which an object can be called a planet.
That condition is that it must clear the neighborhood around it's orbit.
This term is an informal explanation of the part of the process of planet
formation which means that an orbiting body
(such as a planet or protoplanet) must sweep out it's orbital region over
time by gravitationally interacting with smaller bodies nearby.
Pluto you do not do this.

Pluto: I have no idea WHAT the fuck that means.

John: You need to sweep out AND interact with smaller bodies nearby.
Why aren't you interacting more?

Pluto: It's a bunch of dudes man. Look, I have nothing against being gay,
I think you're born that way. I was born to interact with female planets.
If I wanted it the other way, I'd be all over Uranus.

John: Some researchers argue that Earth, Mars, Jupiter, and Neptune
also have not fully cleared their orbital zones either and should be
tossed out.

Pluto: Right, Earth not a planet. Mars not a planet. That'll never happen
and if it does, you'll be something cooler and all of us will become planets
again. I'm only comforted in the fact that you're pretty close to wiping
yourself off your own Planets. I'm just going to be patient for the next
species to take over and get my status back with them. Hopefully it
won't be the dinosaurs again, man, what a bunch of dicks.

http://depts.washington.edu/kexp/blog/?p=894